Being a Customer Support Analyst (fancy position name for 1st-level Helpdesk), with my team, we basicallly weed out the easy-to-fix problems and raise awareness to the higher levels of support through problem tickets. Therefore, we get a wide variety of calls from the computer illiterate to the technically sound.
So, when I got this email from a co-worker a few weeks ago and I thought it was HILARIOUS:
The following are a number of transcribed conversations to technical support departments:
Tech support: What kind of computer do you have?
Christine: A white one…
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Customer:Hi, this is Maureen. I can’t get my diskette out.
Tech support: Have you tried pushing the button?
Customer: Yes, sure, it’s really stuck.
Tech support: That doesn’t sound good; I’ll make a note.
Customer: No , wait a minute…I hadn’t inserted it yet…it’s still on my desk…Sorry….
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Tech support: Click on the ‘My Computer’ icon on to the left of the screen.
Customer: Your left or my left?
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Tech support: Good day. How may I help you?
Male customer: Hello…I can’t print.
Tech support: Would you click on “Start” for me and –.
Customer: Listen pal, don’t start getting technical on me! I’m not Bill Gates.
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Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can’t print. Every time I try, it says ‘Can’t find printer’. I’ve even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can’t find it…
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Customer: I have problems printing in red…
Tech support: Do you have a color printer?
Customer: Aaaah…………………thank you.
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Tech support: What’s on your monitor now, ma’am?
Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me at Woolies..
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